Tony La Russa's Daughter Is An Attractive Raiders Cheerleader

I use the images above as exhibit A, B, and C to reach the following verdict: Tony La Russa may be one of the ugliest people on this planet we call Earth. I'm sorry to put it that bluntly, but a fact is a fact. There has been more than one time that I've been watching a Cardinals game, they've cut to the dugout, and I've had to stop eating a sandwich. I don't blame the guy, as drinking a crap-ton of liquor, yelling at umps, and spending the summers baking in the sun does little to aid one's complexion.

Still, you can imagine my surprise when I came across this picture:

Pretty attractive, no? Brace yourselves...it's Tony La Russa's DAUGHTER!

Oh, wait, you garnered that from the title of this post? Crap. I should have thought of that.

Oh well, too lazy to change it now.

Apparently Bianca La Russa has tried out to be an Oakland Raiders cheerleader and is going to be named to their dance squad this year. Doing a quick google image search of Bianca La Russa, I am floored this person came from Tony La Russa's family tree and no one knew about it. It's like finding out Dudley Moore's daughter is Brooklyn Decker, or Steven Tyler's daughter is....Liv Tyler...well, you get the point.

Here are more images of Bianca. Credit her mom:

Rolando McClain Had My Favorite Play Of The Week

Now this is a tackle. Actually, it's a WWE move, but who am I to mince words. Extra points for how happy McClain was after getting hit with an unnecessary roughness penalty by the refs. Listen to the crowd react to the replay! I can't say enough good things about this. Genius.

After Loss, Raiders Coach Tom Cable Beats Crap Out Of Self, Others

OAKLAND, California - After the Raiders 34-13 loss to the Redskins yesterday, Tom Cable, noted already under investigation by the league for alleged physical abuse against former Raiders assistant Randy Hanson and mistreatment of his wives, beat the living crap out of himself.

The pudgy, bulldog-looking coach showed up for Monday practice with a swollen lip and multiple black and blues on his face. He was still foaming at the mouth, and hit a number of inanimate objects (including, but not limited to, Raiders WR bust Darrius Heyward-Bey).

"I think coach might have an anger management problem", said RB Justin Fargas, shortly before his head was separated from his body by Cable. Immediately following the decapitation by Cable, a booming voice filled the practice facility. It was believed to be crazy Radiers owner Al Davis, who had seen the crime and had said over a microphone the word, "Fatality!"