Tuesday, September 23, 2008

New Orlando Magic Jerseys: A Review From A Hard To Please Fan

Well, the long wait finally paid off: The Magic unveiled their new look today. Specifically, Dwight Howard unveiled it in his usual Dwight Howard subtle fashion

I want to punch that guy who chants "Dwight Howard! Dwight Howard! Number 12! Number 12!" You know you thought the same thing.

It isn't as much an overhaul as it is an improvement. It takes their over-the-top silly "stars and Disney look" of the 90s, then takes their over-the-top "we are so disgusted by how fruity our outfits used to look that we're going to make our jerseys as boring and bland as possible" look of 2000 on and finds a happy middle ground.

How does it stand up to my expectations is the REAL question:

- Does it have pinstripes, something I loved on the old Magic jerseys?

Check. It not only has stripes, it has wacked out pinstripes that do this weird thing that has them going over the shoulder. It's like the way the Yankees jerseys would look in Back To The Future II!

-Is one of the jerseys black?

Double check. I wanted a return to the black jerseys the Magic wore during the Shaq era, but they did one better and put black on BOTH home and away jerseys by putting them on the sides. Slick.

-Did they do something about that piss poor writing on the chest?

Check. No longer are we bored by the font, with them instead going with some sort of futuristic font thingy.

-Did they lose some of those ridiculous stars they had all over their jerseys/logo?

Check. No longer looking like the ceiling of a 8th graders bedroom (what with those glow in the dark stars they put everywhere...okay it wasn't a perfect analogy) the Magic have cut back on the silly stars all over the place. Thank the lord.

-Did they do something to spruce up their logo?

Hmm...not as far as I can see. Their logo isn't all that bad, so this isn't the end of the world, but it still would have been fun to see something a little different to accompany their new jerseys. Perhaps an image of a person eating cheddar flavored Sun Chips, or watching that slow motion scene in Fast Times At Ridgemont High, or something else you find magical. Man, I'm tough to please.

-Did they not irrevocably screw up their image when they are starting to get more popular?

Check. This was the biggest one for me. They could have trotted out something like the shitstorm that was the new Timberwolves jersey, but they successfully blended a futuristic looking jersey that was somehow traditional in its execution.

Jolly good show, Magic folk. Jolly good. I look forward to seeing JJ Redick decaying on the bench with these on. Overall review: A


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