Tuesday, November 13, 2007

Isiah Thomas Vs. Stephon Marbury...A Clash Of The Titans

I wonder if Spike Lee even cares anymore.

As you might have heard by now, lovable headcase and THF banner member (he's the guy sticking his head out of the limo above on the far right) Stephon Marbury made headlines by not showing up to Knick's practice on Tuesday.

-When questioned about it, Isiah Thomas implied that he had no idea that Stephon wasn't showing, saying that action would be taken and making the situation sound quite serious.

-When Stephon was questioned, he said that Thomas had given him permission to take time off when he asked for it and that everyone just misread what happened.

This leads us to an amusing guessing game with America's most dysfuntional team as to who was actually telling the truth. Let's break down the circus. Do you believe:

A) The guy who is arguably the worst GM in history (though McHale might want to plead his case).
-Who totally fucked up his wikipedia page when he was forced to pay $11.6 million because he notoriously sexually harassed Anucha Sanders. Oops.
-Who, apparently, is the GOD OF POPCORN. I still remain the God of everything else.
-Who said “Bitch, I don’t give a fuck about these white people" to A. Sanders, providing incredible insight into the reason behind why David Lee may be the lone white guy on the Knicks for all of eternity.

B) The guy who has been listed as unmanagable by several coaches. -Even others than Larry Brown!
-Who proudly testified in court that he banged a Knicks cheerleader in his truck despite the fact that he is married.
-Who came out in strong defense of Michael Vick with his "Dogs are animals. Who cares if they die" speeches. Nice one!
-Who at one point said that he wished the three-point line would be moved further back from the basket because it was "too easy for me to score where it is". Yes, he really did say that.
-Who picked up his cell phone right in the middle of that infamous Mike'D up interview in which he said he wanted to average "12 dimes and...3 assists" (This interview was completely yanked off of the internet by his publicists because it was so hilarious. If you can find it, let us know.)
-And, last but not least, might be the worst AND best Steven A. Smith impersonator on the planet.

Looking at this rundown, while Isiah seems to be inept at working in a corporate environment and gets led around by his wang like a divining rod, Stephon just seems to be completely insane. I actually thank the Lord, Jesus Christ, every single evening that I don't have to coach Stephon Marbury. Some things are just impossible.
Wait...someone is chiming in on the subject of Isiah...

Okay, that sealed it for me. Isiah is the wrong party here. Fire Isiah.
Update: Pat Riley's Heat just got blown out by the Bobcats. While I typically find Riley to be a smug prick, insufferable in anything more than short doses, I have to give him credit for what might be the quote of the year so far:

When asked after the game about what he thinks he could do at this point to help the team, he responded, "Me? Play. I guarantee you I should suit up. I'd play better than some of them right now," Riley said Tuesday night. "I guarantee it. I swear to God. With an old hip and 62-years-old and I can't see, I'll play better than some of my guys tonight. Come on, they were pretty bad."

The guy may be Al Pacino's character in "The Devil's Advocate", but I'll be damned if that isn't a great quote.


Post a Comment

Leave us a comment, should you want to be rich and famous.


Zombies Can Dunk Copyright 2009