Monday, February 18, 2008

Jumper Cables Bring Kidd Trade Back From The Brink Of Death


In the Wayne's World street hockey game of life, the Jason Kidd trade is "GAME ON!" again.

The Mavericks and Nets proved it will take more than a little Devean George to crash their party, today agreeing in principle to send Jason Kidd and Malik Allen to Dallas in exchange for Devin Harris, Trenton Hassell, DeSagana Diop, Maurice Ager, 2 first rounders, and Keith Van Horn. Yes, America, Keith Van High Socks is back on the New Jersey Nets where he belongs. Time to dig those old Kidd Mavs and Van Horn Nets jerseys out of the dumpster (sorry, you stay in the trash, Derrick Coleman jersey).

Looking at this deal, the trade actually makes sense for both teams...something I haven't been able to say much in this lopsided trade-laden season. The Nets get a promising young player in Devin Harris and 2 late first rounders to rebuild with, while Dallas gets a two or three year window to win a championship. I did think the Mavs had a good chance of winning the title this season anyways, as I predicted way back when, but now I like their chances even more...I will now use this opportunity to not mention that I also predicted the Bulls and Nets would win their divisions. Those were...you know...bizarre computer glitches I know nothing about.

On a side note, that profile photo of Keith Van Horn above gives me the willies. He normally is an average looking guy, but there he looks like something out of The Hills Have Eyes.

With this deal making so much sense for both teams, I am hereby pledging 2 American dollars to DeSagana Diop, Maurice Ager, or Keith Van Horn to find a way to veto this deal. I will include a extra big bottle of hair gel to Van Horn if he does it, as most people assumed he was dead and it would triple the comedy factor. I'd love to see my Dallas championship prediction pan out, but I would much rather laugh at Kidd being denied the trade again. Think of how fun it would be to see Kidd blowing free throw kisses in the direction of the Turnpike for another few years.

Ah, who am I kidding? This trade is pretty much a done deal. Hopefully I can stomach the Mark Cuban championship celebration, which may or may not include a silly black vest.

1 comments:

Anonymous said...

I thought the last pic was Donny Osmond =P

Post a Comment

Leave us a comment, should you want to be rich and famous.

 

Zombies Can Dunk Copyright 2009