PJ Brown Ends His Career By Retiring In A Noble Fashion...Wait, Nevermind

The year long flirtation of whether PJ Brown would or wouldn't retire has finally reached its climax (Wow, I had no idea that was going to sound so sexual): Today, it became official that Brown is hopping on to ride the Boston Celtics bandwagon (...again, sorta sexual).

For those of you readers who peruse NBA team message boards on the internet, chances are you saw PJ Brown or Chris Webber's name pop up at some point as a possible cheap pickup option for your squad. While Webber's delay in signing seemed to be ego related since he demanded playing time be included in whichever contract he signed, PJ's delay seemed a little more legit. Whenever anyone asked PJ who he saw himself playing for, he would shrug and say that retirement was really the best option until further notice. Even I have to admit that's an adorable response. For the five of you that believed him when he said this, I have a created a nametag for you to wear to help you introduce yourself from here on out:

With PJ slapping some green on his chest (Is that sexual? Perhaps a stripper reference? I have no idea at this point), it is more obvious than ever that he was just waiting to see who would be in definite playoff contention so he could get in for the glory. With the Western Conference being such a crapshoot given all of the good teams, the Celtics are the closest thing to a surefire playoff ticket. At this rate it's only a matter of time before we see Dan Marino and Don Mattingly join the Boston Celtics to get that elusive championship ring.

Crazy to think that most Celtics fans, now hooting and holering around the town about how good their team is, looked like this just last season:

Ah well, at least there's room for more Dolan and Isiah paper bags.